COVID-19: Too close for comfort - Will the pandemic make or break the family?

Home isolation measures were introduced all around the world in an effort to curb the spread of COVID-19, but it's putting families to the test. It has been reported that living and working together in a confined space has created spikes in divorce applications and domestic violence. But during such tumultuous times, forced togetherness does have its own unexpected positives.

In the case of Singapore, will families emerge with stronger bonds after the pandemic, or will they be pushed further apart?

This was the theme for discussion in the fifth episode of the Lee Kuan Yew School's "Asia Thinker Series”, moderated by Assistant Professor Tan Poh Lin, Lee Kuan Yew School of Public Policy, National University of Singapore.

Beyond idealised forms of family

Kicking off the discussion was Dr Ng Kok Hoe, Senior Research Fellow, Lee Kuan Yew School of Public Policy, who drew attention to social exclusion and marginalisation in the areas of housing and minimum income standards.

Diversity exists beyond idealised forms of whole family life. "There is a large demographic in our society who do not live with their families and they face increased risks during these times," says Dr Ng.

The first group consists of migrant workers working and living in Singapore, including almost 300,000 in construction and another 260,000 domestic workers, who are not allowed to bring over their families or form families here.

"Housing means living in crowded and unsafe, purpose-built housing or someone else's home at these times. They're worrying about personal livelihood and safety, as well as their family's safety back home," adds Dr Ng.

The second group are the homeless. The size of this population was about a thousand at the last count, and by Dr Ng’s estimates, there should be more now. The homeless are in a particularly risky position during this pandemic as public spaces have become inaccessible during the "circuit breaker" period. Compounding the problem is the fact that this group already inherently faces higher risks, because many homeless people are older with poor health and nutrition due to the challenges of observing hygiene practices when sleeping rough.

As a society known for home ownership and its comprehensive public housing programme, Singapore is suddenly scrambling for space. For low-income families and individuals living in overcrowded public rental housing, the lack of space has always had an impact on privacy, family relationships, children's education, and health. And these effects are more keenly felt right now more than ever.

"For families with children who live in public rental housing, regardless of household size, the largest flat available has only one bedroom about 40 odd square meters. For single elderly people in a public rental housing system, the situation is even harder. They are in fact required to share a single space, an open space that has no bedrooms, with another stranger and it's only about 30 odd square meters."

He continues, "And this is not even the full scale of people living in inadequate housing, because there are people on the waitlist for public rental housing or who do not have stable permanent housing."

Having to share space as a result of the lockdown also means changes to the structure of family life that have spill-over effects. For low-income families, there is also psychological impact. Being locked down for them may mean a suspension of work and income, and the stoppage of public social services on which they are heavily dependent.

"As a result, low-income families are facing problems meeting basic needs. Many of them are working in service jobs, including essential services for which work-from-home arrangements are not possible. They face an impossible choice between health and income. If they chose health and avoided going to work, then income suffers. If they chose to keep up income, then they may expose themselves and therefore their family to the risk of sickness," he explains.

Public discussions often assume that the essential material needs have been met in Singapore society. However, the truth is that even in normal times, things like housing and food security continue to be a problem for some families. If we truly want to consider the effects this pandemic has on the family, Dr Ng warns that this crisis "should awaken us to the reality that as a society we have not yet been able to meet everyone's basic needs."

The effects on family

Professor Wei-Jun Jean Yeung, Provost-Chair Professor, Sociology Department and Centre for Family and Population Research, National University of Singapore, continues by sharing what we can learn from history as well as academic research. She details how major shocks such as economic recessions and natural disasters have affected the family, how families have coped, and what some of the factors that could mitigate this impact are.

Unlike the past, as Professor Yeung notes, what we're seeing here amidst COVID-19 is that multiple shocks are happening simultaneously — something that we rarely see in history.

"In times like this, most families will experience major income loss and many will lose their jobs. Some will have family members who become extremely ill or die. Such events are linked to emotional distress, anxiety, depression, health problems, unstable marriages, and mounting tension in the family. Couples have more quarrels and conflict. Intergenerational relations become more tense. Parents, for example, could use harsher parenting behaviour to children. So it is not surprising that we have been seeing a rise in divorce and domestic violence abuse in many countries recently," says Professor Yeung.

In times like these families try to cope in a myriad of ways, but there are still high social, economic and psychological costs on the quality of their lives.

"They often cut consumption on food, entertainment, healthcare expenditures, postpone getting major services such as houses or cars, and postpone entering into major life events such as getting married, or having a baby. Many also move into cheaper living quarters or double up with families or friends to save cost.

However, despite these general trends, Professor Yeung stresses that these shocks have uneven effects on different families.

Families that have been saving for rainy days can weather the storms much better. A strong social support network also matters, such as other family members who can provide resources and help of various kinds or offer emotional support. The emotional stress is also reduced if the family has a cohesive relationship or a common religious belief. And ultimately, strong community, government and public safety nets can make a world of difference.

There is also an uneven impact on individuals and even family members of the same household. As Professor Yeung points out, ulnerable groups are often those with low education.

She outlined several societal trends: "Youth unemployment rate is usually three to five times higher than the adult unemployment rate. Women are often the first to go when there's a layoff. They also have higher occupational health hazards because many of them work in the healthcare industry. They may experience violence at home and they carry out disproportionately more unpaid labour of childcare and housework at home. Then there are racial minority groups, the elderly, and migrant workers as well."

These shocks have both short term and long term impacts. Research in the UK and Germany clearly shows that graduating cohorts during the economic recession will still have lower wages five years after the recession. Children who grew up in the Great Depression are also more likely to have mental and behavioural problems in adulthood.

What we need to realise is that the impact of COVID-19 will not disappear on June 1st, when the circuit breaker is over. We need to be concerned about its aftermath," says Professor Yeung.

Strengthening families from within

Mr Ishak Ismail, Chairman, Families for Life (FFL) Council, points out that even families that fall within the definitions of an idealised family unit (i.e. "mainstream families") face an increased strain during these times.

According to Mr Ismail, whether the pandemic makes or breaks the family, all comes down to the family itself. "The family needs this moment to then decide how to collectively move forward," he says.

For the "mainstream households" that have parents and children living together, there is still time to work on building stronger families during this period. Indeed, external support matters, but as Mr Ismail notes, growing stronger needs to come from within the families themselves.

"Perhaps the pandemic and the circuit breaker opened us to the realisation that our families matter, and that this is the opportunity that is being presented to us in making our families stronger," he says. A forced togetherness is a good time for families to realise that the family unit does play a key role in riding out these difficult times.

He emphasises that at the crux of it all, family members are in relationships with one another, and are not mere robots programmed to live together. "And as with any relationship, it needs work, and it needs attention," says Mr Ismail.

When it comes to the "mainstream family", Mr Ismail believes that society needs to focus on strengthening families beyond the circuit breaker period — which is what the Families for Life Council is aiming to achieve.

"We will partner organisations, whether it's private or public agencies, to find that ecosystem to support our families." He continues, "We need to roll up programmes targeted at families across different life stages, be it marriage, having kids, or taking care of elderly parents. We need to make these programmes accessible, be present, and be right where these people are and reach into the community."

Learning from this pandemic

In a span of a few months, the COVID-19 pandemic has already caused massive changes to all our lives: the disruption of education, rising unemployment, as well as health scares among many others. With all these burdens weighing heavily on individuals simultaneously, they inevitably combine to have a cumulative effect on the family unit as a whole.

Despite this, Dr Ng believes that society can learn something from this crisis and emerge stronger: "We perhaps cannot pre-empt what has already happened now. But this COVID-19 situation is pointing us towards what to do next, which is that we must know and draw the right lessons from this crisis."

As this strain falls disproportionately along social and economic lines, more effort needs to be put into protecting the vulnerable and marginalised demographics of the population. Strengthening all kinds of families, both unique cases as well as those that fall into the mainstream, needs to be a priority moving forward.

He continues, "What we have failed to notice before, we must not ignore anymore. For the problems that have been longstanding and deeply rooted, we must now tackle with much more resolve after the crisis is over."

Watch the full recording of COVID-19: Too close for comfort: Will the pandemic make or break the family?

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